Yes, you see it right. I still have an old-fashioned, pink, paper driving licence. And it is a Belgian one too. How come? Well, years ago I was living in Belgium when my bag got stolen during a weekend in Sevilla. I will spare you all the details about how that happened and how the Spanish police guy looked at me in the most pitiful way: “you stupid tourist”. I ended up missing my credit card size Dutch driving licence and getting this little pink old-fashioned booklet. But soon, I have to miss my licence for about two weeks, because I need to get my Dutch one back, and I will not be able to drive around for that period in between. Bugger. The thing is, days in a row I never use the car. But when I want to, or need to, I just do.
This freedom of just driving whenever I need it’s not something I give much thought on a regular base. So why now, besides the fact that I need to change my licence and I find it really hard to plan when it’s the best time to miss my licence for two weeks?
Well, last week I have witnessed how one of my clients has made the conscious decision that she is going to take driving lessons and get her licence. She already set the date to start. Because she wants to. Because she realised that having her driving licence she gets steps closes to what she wants. What she really needs. She wants more independence. Being able to take the car whenever she needs to without the help of another driver, usually her husband, or not being limited by public transportation, is getting her just that. She wants a more equal partnership with her husband, sharing more of the tasks and chores that come along with rasing children. Sharing driving to all sorts of clubs and school stuff gets her more of the kind of partnership she likes. She needs more freedom, to move around, to get closer to forests to hike, to just meet up with friends. She slowly discovers how to meet her needs.
Photo by Matthew Henry on Unsplash
During our sessions my client realised that getting her driving lessons will bring her much more than just the ability to drive. It is a first step towards more independence, equal partnership and freedom. And even more, it empowers her that after the first step, she can take the second, and third, and so on to follow her goals. The feeling of empowerment is the engine in believing in yourself.